Ladies and Gentleman, I come to you on the brink of a great discovery. When I was in 6th grade I went on a field trip to the Center of the American Heart Association. While there I remember they passed around a jelly like model of what 5 pounds of excess body weight can look like. As a chubby kid who constantly never thought he fit into his clothes, I was disgusted. I saw that weight and I felt my body grow heavier, sinking into the ground. I felt that weight on me forever since then. Forever since recently.
Forever since now.
Now I don’t feel that way. Now I couldn’t be happier. Because before I was disgusted, but I didn’t do anything about it. Why? Why should I? ‘I’m not that fat’ I’d think. And I wasn’t, not really. When I was in 8th grade I was probably around 6 feet tall and I weighed 215 pounds. I wore size 38 pants and I was terribly unhappy. I was consistently hyper aware that I was the ‘fat kid’ of the group. The chubby one. The funny fatty. But that was fine, I liked being funny. To make fun of yourself and laugh at yourself, that’s what you learn to do. To hide your shame in excited breath. And I am an avid learner. I live to adapt and to change with the environment I inhabit. I fit the role that I saw fit(fat) for me. But sometimes learning comes slow.
Sometimes learning takes years.
Even for the pro learners out there. But this I learned. This great discovery threshold we have crossed has led as here: I learned that if you can’t laugh at something about yourself, change it. If you really don’t like that people say you chew loud, either laugh it off or change it. If you really don’t like that lately you’ve been a sloppy blackout drunken mess and people HAVE noticed, then learn to laugh with them at your embarrassingly poor choices or change it. If you really can’t stand to laugh at another gaff about your weight, then change it. So I did. Before now I was disgusted, so I did something about it. And today I remember back to that field trip at the heart association. Back to that jelly mold model of 5 pounds of excess body weight. I realize I have lost 45 pounds in 3 months and maintained my results for 3 months following. This has been the happiest 6 months of my life, I’m glad to say.
Yet now I find myself considering that bulk and I cannot even imagine where that 45 pounds of lost weight had been stored; but, more importantly, how disgusting is that? And now it’s out of me. I am changed. Like I said:
I couldn’t be happier.